youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Randomize
