I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
