Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
