mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
