Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
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