i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
4 words: hood of his car
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
