My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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