I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
he fucked my hip out of place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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