Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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