We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize