Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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