that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
True strength comes from lack of pants
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
