that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
