Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Randomize