Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize