What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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