I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
