i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Randomize
