Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
