We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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