remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize