2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize