so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
MIDGETS
????
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
i think im in europe. pls send help
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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