I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
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