She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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