oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
youre lurking in front of me
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
babies were throwing up all over the place
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
