i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Randomize
