So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
