Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
