dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
