Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
