you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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