I CAN MOONWALK!
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
thus making me awesome and them whores
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Randomize
