I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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