I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize