he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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