I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Found your dick twin last night
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize