she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
