You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Randomize
