does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
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Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
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He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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