I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
