You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
