was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Randomize
