why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Randomize
