I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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