hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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