can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Randomize
