You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize
