Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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