Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize