Can i not drive my cunt home
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Randomize
